Thursday, December 4, 2008

Why do people ask me stupid questions?

Ok so I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt but I am seriously overwhelmed by the amount of idiotic (and wedding/marriage related) questions that seem to come flying my way.

Before the Big Guy and I got engaged we were dating for a really long time and relentlessly we would get asked, "Why haven't you guys gotten married?" or "When are you gonna get married already?" Now besides the inherent lack of tact it takes to ask anything in this line of questioning, there is also the complete and utter deficiency in common sense to ask uninvited personal questions about someone else's relationship. If you're close (and I mean CLOSE) family member then it may be acceptable to inquire into the relationship of your child/grandchild but if that does not describe you, then put the detective act away and honestly chill!

But, my absolute, all-time favorite has got to be, "So, are you engaged yet?" This was asked not only by people we hadn't seen in a long time and not only by older relatives but by acquaintances and friends who we saw on a regular basis in our age group!!! 

My real problem with this question is, if you feel that you are close enough to us to ask this preposterously stupid question then wouldn't you assume we would have TOLD YOU somehow??? I kept wondering if these people thought that I had Alzheimer's. As if they will ask, "Are you engaged yet?" and I will say, "OMG! We are! I totally forgot to tell you until just this second that you reminded me! Thank goodness for your constant pestering or I would have forgotten to tell anyone that the man I love has asked me to spend the rest of my life with him. Silly me!"

So when we did get engaged (and announced the news pretty well I might add), I thought well at least the idiot parade of engagement interrogation is over. Yeh people will ask about planning process and stuff like that but at least it won't be the same stupid "are you?" over and over again! Ahhh! How naive! How wrong! I learned my lesson today, when friend of mine from high school (whose wedding I recently attended and who I had planned on inviting to my own) asked me, "Hey, are you MARRIED yet?"

11 comments:

east side bride said...

Just wait until you get the retarded "How's married life?" comments!

EliandMe said...

I'm always asking stupid questions - not because I mean to cause offence, I'm just clumsy at making conversation. Don't hate me Bridechka!

p.s. are you married yet?

Bridechka said...

Haha, I can hardly wait east side!

Eliandme, you are forgiven ... just this one time ... since I disagreed with that one time about some controversial post or something ;)

Blablover5 said...

Or there are always the "So when are you gonna have kids?" questions as well.

It was weird everyone had started in on us getting engaged at the same time. And we're talking complete strangers. They'd ask if we were planning on getting married then when we'd say no they'd backtrack as though they just made my guys life a living hell.

Jenny.Lee said...

i HATE the when you are going to have kids comment. HATE IT.

Luzel @ iDiY said...

Hear hear! I'm so looking forward to the inevitable baby question from family this Christmas. Ugh.

Krista said...

Haha ... So, are you married yet? Awesome! I've had that question from 1 person who I don't know well. And it was a well meant questions (via email) genuinely asking (and apologizing because they forgot what date we'd sent). So it was a different scenario.

I've already been asked the kids. I say, oh we're going to wait about a year to enjoy married life, then we'll see.

bridechic said...

My husband decided to spend the rest of our life as a family of 2. Invaribly the kid question is the one we get asked all the time . . . Married 14 years folks are still asking. Once I do tell whoever that our daughter is a 6 lb. Chihuahua the conversation usually stops cold.

Adrienne said...

That is hilarious. I hear you, we got the same kind of questioning. HOwever i am fully expecting the kid questions to kick up as soon as we are married...actually, they already have.

Bridechka said...

Oh man people are already starting to dance around the kids questions. The best was when we announced that we were engaged one asshole went, "really?? Are you pregnant?"

Ummmm, yeah, there are other reasons to get married besides pregnancy, no? Oh my mistake then!

Abbie said...

Friends (and not-friends) would ask me the "are you engaged yet?" question nearly every time they saw me for YEARS. Seriously. Get over it. "You'll be the first to know" was my standard response. Now, I hardly hear a thing... but I'm sure the baby question will come up just after the wedding.